On Giving Advice

“Wisdom is the ability to take your own advice” Sam Harris

Realize that giving advice from your own personal experience or autobiography will create much better engagement. Speaking from a pedestal never turns out well.

If asked for advice, you really need to gauge how serious the requester is. Are they just asking in hopes of getting some validation or in opening up a complaining dialogue? Do they really want detailed, specific advice? A great question I saw from Ramit Sethi was this…”How serious are you?”. Then listen closely to the answer. Anything short of “I’m ready and will do anything you say” means they aren’t ready…just tell them they are doing great and move on.

The flip side of this is to also be careful with requests for help to others. Some say, “It never hurts to ask”, but this isn’t true. If you ask someone for a favor and put them in an uncomfortable position, they may not help you and may avoid you at all costs to avoid being further “uncomfortabilized”…new word! If you must ask, follow the “Give, Give, Give, and Give Some More” policy.

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